Angels

“If God really loves me, where is he now when I need him the most?” That was the thought that ran through my mind often during those first weeks and months when my divorce hit. Sure, I read over and over in the Gospels how God will never abandon me. How even the hairs on my head are numbered. How he feeds the birds and I am so much more important to him then birds. And how he will give me rest. I so wanted to believe all that, but my reality frankly was very different. I often felt very alone–even abandoned.

As I look back on those dark days, I now realize that God did not abandon me, far from it. While he didn’t show up physically at my door step offering to take care of me, what he did do was send his angels. People started appearing in my life that I either did not know, or had not seen in a long time, ready to help. I had a women from my kids’ school suddenly start to drop dinner by once a week. An old friend called out-of-the-blue and offered to help me with the kids. People at work started to pick up my slack when I had to be out for all the court proceedings. A dear friend made it a point to stop by once a week and take me out to lunch and patiently listen to my endless ranting. Then the emails and letters of encouragement started to pour in. No, God did not abandon me. He revealed his incredible mercy by sending his legions of angels to me in the form of all these people to look after me and walk with me in my darkest days. In all my pain, I just didn’t recognize it. Keep trusting in God, he is sure to send angels your way. My bet is that he already has.

For he commands his angels with regard to you, to guard you wherever you go. – Psalm 91:11

 

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2 thoughts on “Angels

  1. Thank you for these words of encouragement. I have also felt abandoned and alone at times. And sometimes feel so helpless, confused, and alone. And while I’ve had the support of family and close friends, there continues to be this emptiness and pain in me. The most pain I feel is what my 4 year old son has had to face and endure. That is where my pain is overwhelming. I’ve tried to lean and grow my faith but it feels like for every step forward I move two steps back. It’s almost as if the evil one says “oh no. You can’t get stronger, and something else hits me like a wall and the swirl starts all over again. This story resonated with me and I do hope one day soon I can start to feel the peace in my heart.