Outsider

I will never forget the feeling of isolation I felt when I was going through my divorce. I turned to my parish and there were no programs for people who were separated or divorced. I tried to talk to my Pastor, and while he tried his best, he could offer me nothing more than the simple […]

Be Radical

Have you ever had a time during the course of your divorce when you felt like doing something radical? I’ve spoken to many people who have done just that.  Maybe they adopted a totally new look, got a completely new haircut, sold their minivan for a sports car, or started to go clubbing.  When we go […]

Oxygen

When I was in the throes of my divorce, and my world was collapsing around me, my counselor suggested that I read one of the psalms each day. She said that they would encourage me and give me hope. She was so right. My daily reading of the psalms became my oxygen when I was […]

Fear Factor

Divorce can bring a tremendous amount of fear, uncertainty and doubt. In a moment, a lifetime of dreams and plans can be destroyed. It is during these times that it can feel like you were dropped in a foreign land-with no map-in the dark. It can be a very scary feeling! Scripture repeatedly reassures us […]

Silver Lining

As the fog of emotional pain was starting to lift from my divorce, I made an unexpected discovery: quiet time. Every other weekend the kids went off to their other parent. Initially, the house seemed eerily quiet after the kids left. But over time I came to really appreciate, even look forward to, having this time […]

Normal Again?

The stress and strain of divorce is so intense. The emotional pain is overwhelming. It is a battle just to get through the day. You can’t think straight. You walk around with a pit in your stomach. Often you are afraid of what the future will hold. You can’t imagine a day when things will be […]

No Matter What

One morning I walked into Mass very distracted and anxious. I had many things on my mind: projects due at work, challenges with the kids, financial pressures, dealing with the ex, etc. On top of that, I wasn’t feeling well. It was hard to focus on the Mass. Frankly, I was just going through the […]

Set Apart

“This feels like a death,” I distinctly remember telling my mother on a very cold, and very lonely, November day, shortly after my divorce was filed. A divorce is a death—the death of a marriage. And with it comes all the same feelings of grief that are associated with a physical death. And like a […]

Put Down The Gloves

Several years ago, I brought my then five-year-old daughter to the doctor for her annual physical. She was due for a couple of immunizations, and I was trying to find a delicate way of answering her repeated question, “Am I going to get any shots?” I managed to avoid answering the question directly with responses […]

House of Love

“Why are you taking pictures of a church that doesn’t care about its people?!” were the words that rudely broke the silence as I was trying to inconspicuously take a few pictures of a magnificent old church near where I was visiting. I turned around to see a disheveled older man who clearly hadn’t had […]