Like clockwork, my mom would change the sheets every Thursday. I remember how good it felt crawling into bed on Thursday evenings. Looking back, I am sure I did not appreciate that as much as I should have, or realize the level of effort it took to make that happen every week. I do now. It is one of the ways that I know I was unconditionally loved. Isn’t it funny, it is not the vacations, or cars we drove, or material things we owned that affirm that I was loved. It is the simple, consistent acts of love like clean sheets every week and home cooked meals every night.
To this day, I draw my security in life from the fact that my childhood was filled with those simple acts of love. My parents’ consistent love for me reaffirmed to me everyday that I was worth it. I was worth the sacrifice it took to have clean sheets, hot meals, and the many other things my parents did for me every single day. Without using words, they shouted everyday “YOU ARE WORTH IT!” Nothing, and nobody, can ever take away the deep sense of security and self-worth that my parents gave me by their acts of selfless love. I carry it with me everyday and it is the foundation of my life.
One of the great tragedies of divorce is that it robs children of their sense of security. What was once routine and commonplace is often completely disrupted in the blur of two different households, two different routines, and two different sets of values–not to mention the intense emotional trauma. It’s no wonder that kids are often left questioning their importance and self-worth. The best thing you can do for your children (no matter what their age) is to “shout” by your actions every day that they are so worth your time, attention, and sacrifice. While you can’t change the fact that your children have suffered through a divorce, you can ensure that the message ringing in their mind, heart, and soul for the rest of their lives is “YOU ARE SO WORTH IT!”
I urge you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, your spiritual worship. – Romans 12:1