It was the day my divorce was filed and I remember dropping to my knees and yelling out to God, “Make this madness stop!” I could not believe this was actually happening. No sooner had the words left my mouth when a feeling of extreme doubt filled me. Questions flooded my mind. What if there is no God? What if my Catholic faith is based on some charade? What if Christ is just some feel-good story? Am I a fool for believing all of this? Where is the proof?
I knelt there feeling numb, not sure what to do. Praying was just too big a question mark at that moment. I continued to kneel, completely exhausted emotionally and physically. The last thirty days had been the month from hell. Then it hit me. I suddenly became very aware of my family: my kids, my parents, and my brothers and sisters. I thought of my three beautiful girls and how their faces radiated innocence and goodness. What a gift they are to me! I thought about my amazing parents who were always so available to help and encourage me. I thought of my brothers and sisters who surrounded me with their love by calling to check in on me often and, just as often, dropping everything to pitch in.
In the flash of awareness, I realized that God was in and among them. He was making Himself visible in the love of my kids and family! It was as if God was telling me, “I am right here surrounding you with love and care through your family—through the people who love you the most.” This made a huge impact on me. It opened my eyes to how God was quite clearly—and visibly—working in my life. It was living proof of His reality and love for me. Let the love of those that care about you the most be all the proof you need that God is real and He surrounds you with His love, always.
“I made known to them your name and I will make it known, that the love with which you loved me may be in them and I in them.” – John 17:26
Originally posted 2015-03-16 06:00:14.
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