No Pain. No Gain.

“I can’t believe I did that! Is this me?!,” exclaimed one of our workshop participants (we’ll call her Jayne) after sharing that she recently defended her ex-husband to her family. Evidently, Jayne’s family was giving her a rather hard time about her ex, and she responded by defending him in his absence. What surprised her […]

Be Radical

Have you ever had a time during the course of your divorce when you felt like doing something radical? I’ve spoken to many people who have done just that.  Maybe they adopted a totally new look, got a completely new haircut, sold their minivan for a sports car, or started to go clubbing.  When we go […]

Hitting the Wall

I often equate going through a divorce to being in a severe car accident. In both cases you emerge very badly battered and wounded, one emotionally and the other physically. Just as it takes a significant amount of time to heal from the physical injuries of a car accident, it also takes significant time to heal emotionally from […]

Infinity Googolplex

I was putting my son to bed one evening, as I often do, and I was laying next to him joining him in his evening prayers. When we were done, I reached over, kissed him, blessed him, and told him goodnight. He replied, “Goodnight, I love you.” I then replied, “I love you more!” He […]

Crazy Betty

I stayed in the house with the kids after the divorce, and I decided I needed to spruce the place up a bit.  A friend had recommended an interior designer to me, named Betty. I came to call her Crazy Betty because she was always hitting on me, and, invariably after our meetings, she would […]

A New Path

The face was pretty, yet the eyes held a deep sadness. I would guess that “Sandy” was in her late 30’s. She came to one of my workshops searching for answers. While she couldn’t quite seem to put the questions into words, her being there told the whole story. “I have been divorced about a […]

God’s Favorites

When my divorce was final, my kids were all under the age of ten, with my youngest going into kindergarten.  I was now a single parent responsible for raising these little kids, while trying to piece my life back together, and running a demanding business. Life was stressful, to say the least. Since my kids […]

Crash and Burn

A familiar face popped up on my screen after I ran a search for “available” singles, between the ages of 35-45, in my city. My curiosity had gotten the best of me, and I was on a Catholic dating site “just looking” at who had created profiles. I was pleasantly surprised to find someone I […]

True Freedom

Divorce always sounds like the word “divide” to me. I am no Latin expert, but my guess is they both have the same root word. Sadly, divorce is a time marked by division. Much of what you love and cherish has been lopped off. You tend to be consumed with fighting to keep what is […]

The Path

Life after my divorce was so uncertain and disorienting. So much had changed. Most of the familiar routines, people, and traditions disappeared. My life felt awkward, almost alien. It really was as if I had been dropped onto Mars. I spent most of my energy numbly fumbling around trying to make sense of the my new life’s landscape. I […]