Yo-Yo

Dealing with teenagers can be a real challenge. A typical teenager is concerned with one thing in their lives: themselves. As a result, they tend to make their relationship with their parents very transactional. They expect to request and to receive, and nothing more. Give them the car keys, and they are happy. Give them money […]

New Life

About a year after my divorce was final, I moved fifteen miles into a more modest home. It was a really big step overall. I was moving my three young kids to a new neighborhood and new schools. I was moving into a house that needed a fair amount of remodeling. Plus, I hadn’t even […]

X Marks the Spot

“I am afraid that if I start to cry, I won’t be able to stop.” shared Susan during one of my workshops. Sadly, Susan’s husband had just informed her one week earlier that he was leaving her. Understandably, she was shattered. Fast forward three months later, and Susan, while still in the throes of divorce, […]

Inexhaustible

“That’s not fair!” screamed my five-year-old through a stream of tears. He was very upset that his older brother had received a fancy t-shirt as his souvenir on a recent trip to a Florida theme park. Ironically, just moments before, he was quite satisfied with the whiz-bang light saber he had chosen as his souvenir. […]

Do Not Be Afraid

One of the most common reactions to divorce is fear. That is very understandable. Who wouldn’t be scared if their entire life came crashing in around them? The problem with fear is not being scared, that’s normal. The problem is acting on fear. That’s when fear becomes a lousy strategy. Here is a better strategy: hope. Hope is not about ignoring […]

Snake Oil

The world offers so many remedies for our emotional pain. Unfortunately, they are usually nothing more than snake oil, holding the promise of healing, but in the end are just an illusion. Jesus is the Real Deal, the Divine Physician, who wants to heal you of your pain and sorrow. While He came over 2,000 years […]

Pain Instructs

Not long ago one of my teenagers was grumbling about not being able to go out with friends because she had mismanaged her money and did not have enough money to buy gas for her car. She was not happy. We had a brief parent/daughter exchange about what lesson she learned from not managing her […]

Overcoming Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt

Divorce can bring a tremendous amount of suffering and uncertainty. In a moment, a lifetime of dreams and plans can be destroyed. It is during these times that it can feel like you were dropped in a foreign land with no map–in the dark. It can be a very scary feeling! Scripture repeatedly reassures us that […]

What Would Jesus Do?

Recently, someone posted a very moving plea on our divorcedcatholic.org forum. Here is an excerpt from the post: I am so sorry for what I have done, but the guilt and heartache over what I have done is crushing me and I want so desperately to reconcile with God and the Church. Their pain, caused by their […]

Overcoming Challenges

I thought that once my divorce was final, life would get back to some sense of normal and most of my divorce-related struggles would disappear. Yeah, right. I quickly discovered that the primary change was the types of struggles I faced, not struggles themselves.   My main struggle initially was committing to a chaste lifestyle. That one […]