Overcoming Challenges

I thought that once my divorce was final, life would get back to some sense of normal and most of my divorce-related struggles would disappear. Yeah, right. I quickly discovered that the primary change was the types of struggles I faced, not struggles themselves.   My main struggle initially was committing to a chaste lifestyle. That one […]

Worms

Gizmo was pacing around in circles. My brother had found this little, skinny puppy shivering and cold underneath his car in the parking lot of his office. He decided to adopt the dog, and he had just returned from the vet after the initial check-up. As is common for puppies, Gizmo had intestinal worms. Suddenly, […]

Silver Lining

As the fog of emotional pain was starting to lift from my divorce, I made an unexpected discovery: quiet time. Every other weekend the kids went off to their other parent. Initially, the house seemed eerily quiet after the kids left. But over time I came to really appreciate, even look forward to, having this time […]

What Would Jesus Do?

Recently, someone posted a very moving plea on our divorcedcatholic.org forum. Here is an excerpt from the post: I am so sorry for what I have done, but the guilt and heartache over what I have done is crushing me and I want so desperately to reconcile with God and the Church. Their pain, caused by their […]

Training Your Ex

I could see the frustration and apprehension on Chloe’s face as she was telling me about her latest travail with her former spouse. Chloe was a participant in our Recovering from Divorce Program and had just gone through a divorce during the past year. She was really struggling with creating a cooperative, working relationship with her […]

No Matter What

One morning I walked into Mass very distracted and anxious. I had many things on my mind: projects due at work, challenges with the kids, financial pressures, dealing with the ex, etc. On top of that, I wasn’t feeling well. It was hard to focus on the Mass. Frankly, I was just going through the […]

Set Apart

“This feels like a death,” I distinctly remember telling my mother on a very cold, and very lonely, November day, shortly after my divorce was filed. A divorce is a death—the death of a marriage. And with it comes all the same feelings of grief that are associated with a physical death. And like a […]

Unfair Advantage

“If you have to go through a divorce, thank God you are Catholic!” I exclaimed to a group of divorced and separated Catholics. A puzzled look replaced the mostly pain-filled expressions I saw staring back at me. I knew what they were thinking: “How is being Catholic going to get me out of this mess?” […]

Lite Brite

I had a Lite Brite as a kid and loved it. It always excited me to start out with a blank, black page and see the picture that would emerge as I carefully pushed each colored peg through the paper. I would turn off all the lights in my room and marvel at the image […]