Outsider

I will never forget the feeling of isolation I felt when I was going through my divorce. I turned to my parish and there were no programs for people who were separated or divorced. I tried to talk to my Pastor, and while he tried his best, he could offer me nothing more than the simple […]

The Path

Life after my divorce was so uncertain and disorienting. So much had changed. Most of the familiar routines, people, and traditions disappeared. My life felt awkward, almost alien. It really was as if I had been dropped onto Mars. I spent most of my energy numbly fumbling around trying to make sense of the my new life’s landscape. I […]

Overjoyed

“I have to tell you that I have gotten some feedback that the name of your ministry is making some people uncomfortable,” my spiritual director advised me. When I probed further, I was told that promoting a ministry with the name “Divorced Catholic” was interpreted as promoting divorce, and, further, my zeal for helping divorced […]

Suffer? Not Me!!!

Not long ago one of my teenagers was grumbling about not being able to go out with friends because she had mismanaged her money and did not have enough money to buy gas for her car. She was not happy. We had a brief parent/daughter exchange about what lesson she learned from not managing her money properly. I, […]

Good Grief

“Mom, it feels like someone has died,” I tearfully said to my mother the month after my divorce was filed. The emotional pain was so overwhelming it paralyzed me. I couldn’t think clearly, and getting through the day doing even just basic tasks, like brushing my teeth or getting dressed, took every ounce of energy […]

Silver Lining

As the fog of emotional pain was starting to lift from my divorce, I made an unexpected discovery: quiet time. Every other weekend the kids went off to their other parent. Initially, the house seemed eerily quiet after the kids left. But over time I came to really appreciate, even look forward to, having this time […]

Few True Friends

Unfortunately, going through a divorce these days is a very public matter. Thanks to the wonders of Facebook, Twitter, and email, it seems the entire world knows all the details of your personal life and trials. You can’t help but feel tried in the court of public opinion. As a result, the tendency is to […]

Overcoming Fear

One of the most common reactions to divorce is fear. That is very understandable. Who wouldn’t be scared if their entire life came crashing in around them? The problem with fear is not being scared, that’s normal. The problem is acting on fear. That’s when fear becomes a lousy strategy. Here is a better strategy: […]

Missing Peace

I used to play a video game with my kids that required all sorts of heroic feats and superhuman strength to conquer the monsters, and overcome the overwhelming obstacles, that greeted you as you wove your way through various pursuits in search of a missing puzzle piece that would solve the riddle and win the […]

Got Your Back

  With the recent anniversary of Pope St. John Paul II’s canonization on Divine Mercy Sunday 2014, it is a good time to be reminded of what this amazing pope and saint-to-be said about divorced Catholics. He has our back! I earnestly call upon pastors and the whole community of the faithful to help the […]