New Math

The best way I can describe the suffering from my divorce is it was like a heavy weight strapped to my back, combined with a gnawing ache in the pit of my stomach. It was always there. The only relief I would get was when I slept. Unfortunately, the second my eyes opened, the pain […]

Seize the Day

Everyday is an opportunity: an opportunity to try again, an opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life, an opportunity to make an improvement in your life. Seize those opportunities every chance you can. It is so easy to live in the pain of yesterday, or be overwhelmed by the uncertainty of the future, that you can […]

Outsider

I will never forget the feeling of isolation I felt when I was going through my divorce. I turned to my parish and there were no programs for people who were separated or divorced. I tried to talk to my Pastor, and while he tried his best, he could offer me nothing more than the simple […]

Lite Brite

I had a Lite Brite as a kid and loved it. It always excited me to start out with a blank, black page and see the picture that would emerge as I carefully pushed each colored peg through the paper. I would turn off all the lights in my room and marvel at the image […]

Below The Surface

It was about a month into my divorce when my former spouse stopped by the house to pick up something. She was all decked-out and clearly very excited about that night’s “big date.” I will never forget it. Here I was being crushed under the emotional weight of the divorce, yet she seemed so unscathed […]

Silly Stupid

Looking back during the first years of my divorce, I realize I made some pretty dumb mistakes. One of the biggest was to start dating within two weeks after my divorce was final. There were plenty more, trust me. Most of my mistakes seemed totally reasonable at the time. How could that be? How could decisions […]

Perfect Prayer

When my divorce hit, it was as if I was run over by a freight train. I hardly knew what hit me. I was confused, disoriented, and could barely think long enough to decide what color socks to wear. It was that bad. My instinctual reaction was to turn to God. That was good. However, […]

Just Not My Time

 “Of course I want intimacy. Every man and every woman does…I look in the mirror each morning and I tell myself, it’s just not my time. God’s got someone out there for me, it’s just not my time.” says Kerri, a 40-ish, divorced, single parent appearing in the Voices of Hope DVD. When sharing her attitude toward dating […]

Stuck

“I hope he rots in Hell!” the woman (let’s call her Marge) sitting in front of me said, her voice filled with bitterness. I sat and listened attentively for the next fifteen minutes as she described in vivid detail all the nasty things her ex did and all the pain he brought into her life. Listening […]