Overcoming Fear

One of the most common reactions to divorce is fear. That is very understandable. Who wouldn’t be scared if their entire life came crashing in around them? The problem with fear is not being scared, that’s normal. The problem is acting on fear. That’s when fear becomes a lousy strategy. Here is a better strategy: […]

Long Haul

“This generation is always looking for a quick fix.” spilled out of my mouth as I was sharing some parenting challenge with a friend. I was smug in my surety that I was different–that I was older and wiser. But the truth is, I’m really not. In fact, I think most people, no matter their […]

Car Wreck

I often equate recovering from divorce to recovering from a near-fatal car accident. You emerge from divorce with your emotional well-being on life support. Every day can bring an avalanche of pain. Relief can be nowhere in sight. Just as physical therapy is used to help mend a broken body, your faith can help mend a […]

Thick Skulls

It was almost 3:00 AM, and I was sitting at my desk in my home office working feverishly. It was the night before a crucial divorce court hearing that would determine the fate of me and my children. I was a nervous wreck. I was so afraid that I would forget some vital evidence, or […]

Be Radical

Have you ever had a time during the course of your divorce when you felt like doing something radical? I’ve spoken to many people who have done just that.  Maybe they adopted a totally new look, got a completely new haircut, sold their minivan for a sports car, or started to go clubbing.  When we go […]

You Are Loved

“You are loved. Do you hear me? YOU ARE LOVED!” were the words the priest said emphatically. This was the central theme of the three-day mission led by this priest in my parish. He was so convinced of this truth, and was trying to convince everyone else who attended, that he actually had buttons made […]

Do You Want the Truth?

“You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!” Those were the famous words that Jack Nicholson delivered so passionately in the movie A Few Good Men. And he was right. Many people can’t handle the truth, especially when it sheds light on poor choices or brings on consequences. This is often the case when […]

Checking the Box

One day, shortly after I had started my annulment process, I was outside doing yard work. My thoughts drifted to the annulment and how I was anxiously anticipating its completion. I remember thinking that I was looking forward to getting my annulment so “I could meet someone more loving and more ’together’ than my ex.” […]

Put Down The Gloves

Several years ago, I brought my then five-year-old daughter to the doctor for her annual physical. She was due for a couple of immunizations, and I was trying to find a delicate way of answering her repeated question, “Am I going to get any shots?” I managed to avoid answering the question directly with responses […]