Father Knows Best

At our house we have a standing requirement that all the kids’ cell phones stay in the kitchen when they go to bed. Boy, how the kids hate this rule! They make every excuse in the book as to why they need their cell phones in their bedroom at night. My favorite one is: “I must […]

Silly Stupid

Looking back during the first years of my divorce, I realize I made some pretty dumb mistakes. One of the biggest was to start dating within two weeks after my divorce was final. There were plenty more, trust me. Most of my mistakes seemed totally reasonable at the time. How could that be? How could decisions […]

Stuck

“I hope he rots in Hell!” the woman (let’s call her Marge) sitting in front of me said, her voice filled with bitterness. I sat and listened attentively for the next fifteen minutes as she described in vivid detail all the nasty things her ex did and all the pain he brought into her life. Listening […]

Anchored Down

About a year after my divorce was final, I was invited to go on a spiritual retreat. During the retreat I heard a talk about the need to forgive those who have hurt you. Well, I could definitely relate to the being hurt part, but, frankly, the thought of forgiving my ex just made me angry. I […]

Need A Boost?

While it has been many years since my divorce, there are still days when I feel overwhelmed with life. It happens to all of us. Unfortunately, when going through a divorce, overwhelmed seems to be one’s state of life. I happened upon this Psalm when I was having one of “those” days. Praying it never […]

Hitting the Wall

I often equate going through a divorce to being in a severe car accident. In both cases you emerge very badly battered and wounded, one emotionally and the other physically. Just as it takes a significant amount of time to heal from the physical injuries of a car accident, it also takes significant time to heal emotionally from […]

Angels

“If God really loves me, where is he now when I need him the most?” That was the thought that ran through my mind often during those first weeks and months when my divorce hit. Sure, I read over and over in the Gospels how God will never abandon me. How even the hairs on […]

Lite Brite

I had a Lite Brite as a kid and loved it. It always excited me to start out with a blank, black page and see the picture that would emerge as I carefully pushed each colored peg through the paper. I would turn off all the lights in my room and marvel at the image […]

Pain Instructs

Not long ago one of my teenagers was grumbling about not being able to go out with friends because she had mismanaged her money and did not have enough money to buy gas for her car. She was not happy. We had a brief parent/daughter exchange about what lesson she learned from not managing her […]

Persevere

Going through divorce often feels like a battle. Each day can be a fight just to keep your head above water, often doing the work of two people. All the while dealing with the extremely difficult emotional issues that a divorce invariably brings. It can be overwhelming and so discouraging. Recognize that the source of these […]