The Way

The house was stone quiet. I was all alone. Even though it was past midnight, I could not sleep. I lie there staring up at the ceiling in the dark. I had no peace. It had been a difficult couple of years. I had tried lots of different things. The new relationships, the new house, […]

Why Me?

“Why me?,” was the question I posed to my brother when I broke the news to him about my impending divorce. I was not a perfect spouse, but I was completely committed to my marriage–for life. I really tried so hard to be a loving and faithful spouse. So, why did my marriage end up in […]

Whatever It Takes

I vividly remember telling my brother, who was accompanying me to an important custody hearing, that I was willing to do “whatever it takes” to maintain contact with my children should the judge not rule in my favor. And I meant it. I was even willing to quit my very well-paying job and take a teaching position […]

Medieval Times

After my divorce, I remember scouring the Catechism for information regarding dating and relationships. Frankly, I was looking for a loophole that would allow me to pursue intimate relationships. I rationalized that since I was divorced, there must be certain exemptions for me. I wanted to date again, and I wanted to be intimate. After […]

Suffer? Not Me!!!

Not long ago one of my teenagers was grumbling about not being able to go out with friends because she had mismanaged her money and did not have enough money to buy gas for her car. She was not happy. We had a brief parent/daughter exchange about what lesson she learned from not managing her money properly. I, […]

You Are Loved

“You are loved. Do you hear me? YOU ARE LOVED!” were the words the priest said emphatically. This was the central theme of the three-day mission led by this priest in my parish. He was so convinced of this truth, and was trying to convince everyone else who attended, that he actually had buttons made […]

Do You Want the Truth?

“You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!” Those were the famous words that Jack Nicholson delivered so passionately in the movie A Few Good Men. And he was right. Many people can’t handle the truth, especially when it sheds light on poor choices or brings on consequences. This is often the case when […]

Can God Get to You?

In our Voices of Hope DVD, one of the participants, Marty, says, “If you are afraid, God can’t get to you.” It is a very emotionally charged moment as Marty is recalling his struggles dealing with the pain and suffering during his divorce. Marty is no softy. In fact, he is a big, burly guy. […]

Single-Parenting Challenge: Spending More Time With Your Kids

Seven surefire strategies for having more quality time with your kids after divorce

One of the most common laments I hear from parents after divorce is the loss of quality time with their kids. That is understandable. The time they had with their kids is reduced, whether they are the custodial parent or not. While this challenge is experienced by both parents, it is more acute for the […]