Humble Pie

The month after my divorce was filed, my life was in crisis, to say the least. I was simultaneously dealing with the extremely painful emotional fallout, while trying to work, and take care of three small children. I was consumed with doing all the things I needed to get done. My attitude was, “It is all up […]

Overjoyed

“I have to tell you that I have gotten some feedback that the name of your ministry is making some people uncomfortable,” my spiritual director advised me. When I probed further, I was told that promoting a ministry with the name “Divorced Catholic” was interpreted as promoting divorce, and, further, my zeal for helping divorced […]

A Bridge Back

I often think about the Catholics that have left the faith because of their divorce. The reasons they left are usually because they feel alienated, ashamed, or unwelcome. Often, the annulment process is a stumbling block, too. In any case, there is usually a sense of loss when I talk to them. It is sad. I […]

Do You Want the Truth?

“You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!”  Those were the famous words that Jack Nicholson delivered so passionately in the movie A Few Good Men.  And he was right.  Many people can’t handle the truth, especially when it sheds light on poor choices or brings on consequences.  This is often the case when […]

Eject Button

What do getting divorced, remarried, and divorced again in less than nine months, leaving your kids to become a groupie for a rock band, and moving to South America all have in common? They are all real choices made by people during their first year of divorce. Why would people make such obviously poor decisions? […]

The Path

Life after my divorce was so uncertain and disorienting. So much had changed. Most of the familiar routines, people, and traditions disappeared. My life felt awkward, almost alien. It really was as if I had been dropped onto Mars. I spent most of my energy numbly fumbling around trying to make sense of the my new life’s landscape. I […]

Oprah

Going through my divorce turned my world upside-down. I suddenly started to question everything in my life. What was true? Who could be trusted? It was like my life was thrust into darkness and I was stumbling around trying to gain my bearings. I would talk to anyone who I thought could help me: friends, family, […]

Below the Surface

It was about a month into my divorce when my former spouse stopped by the house to pick up something. She was all decked-out and clearly very excited about that night’s “big date.” I will never forget it. Here I was being crushed under the emotional weight of the divorce, yet she seemed so unscathed […]

Persevere

Going through divorce often feels like a battle. Each day can be a fight just to keep your head above water, often doing the work of two people. All the while dealing with the extremely difficult emotional issues that a divorce invariably brings. It can be overwhelming and so discouraging. Recognize that the source of these […]

My Heart Leapt

I must have looked like a total zombie as I shuffled through the doors of the church. The night before was a complete nightmare and I got absolutely zero sleep. My wife had revealed to me that she did not want to be married anymore. This came as a complete surprise, given that I thought […]