One of the most common reactions to divorce is fear. That is very understandable. Who wouldn’t be scared if their entire life came crashing in around them? The problem with fear is not being scared, that’s normal. The problem is acting on fear. That’s when fear becomes a lousy strategy. Here is a better strategy: hope. Hope is not about […]
“This is the third time this month you have been late picking up the kids. You are going to have to figure out a way to be more on time,” I said coldly. My former spouse just looked at me with a mixture of embarrassment and exhaustion. After the kids were gone and the house […]
When my divorce hit, it was as if I was run over by a freight train. I hardly knew what hit me. I was confused, disoriented, and could barely think long enough to decide what color socks to wear. It was that bad. My instinctual reaction was to turn to God. That was good. However, […]
“I can’t forgive him, he’s not sorry for what he did.” was the response from Stacy when she was asked how she felt about forgiving her former spouse. She went on to explain that she thought that, just as in order to receive forgiveness from God for our sins we must be truly sorry, the […]
“I need your help. My son is pulling out his eyebrows.” was the tearful plea from Meg, a woman in my Recovering from Divorce group. I knew that Meg and her former husband were having a very difficult time co-parenting their children. In fact, they were in a “hot war,” fighting pretty much each day. […]
There is a famous scene in the 1997 movie, Jerry Maguire, where Jerry (Tom Cruise) is trying to reconcile with his wife, Dorothy (Renee Zellweger). He is trying to convince her that his life is meaningless without her. Then he says these three words: “You complete me.” (And the audience swoons with a collective “Aww…”) […]
My first Thanksgiving was so difficult. My divorce was in full swing and my world was crumbling. Frankly, I did not have a thankful attitude. What did I have to be thankful for? Everything in my world was being ripped away from me. Fast forward thirteen years, and here is what I have learned: the most […]
One night, I was in a boat with my brother on a lake near where I live. We could see lightning in the distance and thought that it was far away. It was getting late and we decided to head back to the dock. We were about 15 minutes into a 30 minute boat ride, when suddenly, […]
Are you having a hard time forgiving yourself? Take it to confession and know that Our Lord gave everything to forgive your sins, no matter how great. His mercy is always greater than your sin. Accept it. Next, ask yourself what you can do to repair the damage left by your sin, and do it. […]
My daughter recently graduated from school and was embarking on a major job search. It was rather nerve-wracking for her as she marketed herself to prospective employers. She spent hours working on her resume until it was just right. She would meticulously do her hair and makeup, and make sure she was dressed perfectly. Then, […]