I vividly remember getting the call from my divorce attorney telling me that my spouse was seeking full custody of our children. That shook me to my core and threw me into full-on crisis mode. I did not want to lose my children! Like any good Catholic, I began to storm heaven with my many prayers begging […]
I have a Catholic prayer book that is over one hundred pages long. In this book there is every imaginable prayer. Prayers you would expect, like prayers for healing, but also some you would not, like prayers for safety during bad weather. Catholics never seem to be at a loss for ready-made prayers. It is not […]
Marriages are supposed to be for life. That’s how God designed them. Divorce is an obvious sign that something went seriously wrong with that plan. Most divorces don’t happen overnight. It is usually the result of a cumulative series of events. If you are totally honest with yourself, you can see what role you played […]
I remember how anxious and worried I would be over each new crisis that erupted during my divorce. After the storm passed, I would feel relieved. I would believe I had dealt with the last major problem and calm seas would now prevail. Wrong. No matter how many times I went through the same cycle, […]
One of the most common reactions to divorce is fear. That is very understandable. Who wouldn’t be scared if their entire life came crashing in around them? The problem with fear is not being scared, that’s normal. The problem is acting on fear. That’s when fear becomes a lousy strategy. Here is a better strategy: hope. Hope is not about […]
Life after my divorce was so uncertain and disorienting. So much had changed. Most of the familiar routines, people, and traditions disappeared. My life felt awkward, almost alien. It really was as if I had been dropped onto Mars. I spent most of my energy numbly fumbling around trying to make sense of the my new life’s landscape. I […]
“If you have to go through a divorce, thank God you are Catholic!” I exclaimed to a group of divorced and separated Catholics. A puzzled look replaced the mostly pain-filled expressions I saw staring back at me. I knew what they were thinking: “How is being Catholic going to get me out of this mess?” […]
I could see the frustration and apprehension on Chloe’s face as she was telling me about her latest travail with her former spouse. Chloe was a participant in our Recovering from Divorce Program and had just gone through a divorce during the past year. She was really struggling with creating a cooperative, working relationship with her […]
Living the truth of our faith can be very difficult. We are all guilty of trying to modify a teaching of our faith to make it easier to live. It could be the Church’s teaching on sexual morality, or marriage, or receiving the Sacraments. Unfortunately, when we do this, it stunts our growth toward holiness and […]
When my son was two-years old he went through what’s commonly known as separation anxiety. If I stepped out of the room for a brief moment and he lost sight of me, he would panic. This panic took the form of blood-curdling screams, not the kind that are soliciting attention, but guttural, terrified calls for help. These screams and […]