When my son was two-years old he went through what’s commonly known as separation anxiety. If I stepped out of the room for a brief moment and he lost sight of me, he would panic. This panic took the form of blood-curdling screams, not the kind that are soliciting attention, but guttural, terrified calls for help. These screams and […]
When my divorce was final, my kids were all under the age of ten, with my youngest going into kindergarten. I was now a single parent responsible for raising these little kids, while trying to piece my life back together, and running a demanding business. Life was stressful, to say the least. Since my kids […]
I vividly remember telling my brother, who was accompanying me to an important custody hearing, that I was willing to do “whatever it takes” to maintain contact with my children should the judge not rule in my favor. And I meant it. I was even willing to quit my very well-paying job and take a teaching position […]
I remember when I went through my divorce I was on “high alert” all the time. There were so many things happening all at once, not the least of which was a spouse who mounted a rather nasty legal battle. It seemed the more I did, the more I had to do. Compound that with being […]
One day, as I walked into the kitchen, my four-year-old son was watching his favorite TV show. Patting the seat of his chair, he looked up at me with these big, puppy-dog eyes and said, “Can you come and sit with me?” My heart melted. Even though I had a million things to do, I could […]
One of the most common laments I hear from parents after divorce is the loss of quality time with their kids. That is understandable. The time they had with their kids is reduced, whether they are the custodial parent or not. While this challenge is experienced by both parents, it is more acute for the […]
During my separation, I read a book about how to help kids through divorce. The general wisdom in this book regarding what to tell the kids was: 1) Don’t blame the other parent (good advice) and 2) Tell the kids that the reason for the divorce is because mommy and daddy are having “big people […]
About a year after my divorce, I brought the subject of moving up to my three daughters. I had been through a nasty two-year custody battle and the thought of a fresh start was appealing to me. It made a lot of sense to distance ourselves from some of the people in our neighborhood who […]
I remember clearly the turmoil that surrounded my separation and divorce and how greatly it impacted my kids. Their mom moved out and suddenly their world was turned upside down. To them it was like an explosion went off and they were seriously dazed and confused. Nothing was familiar any more. Everything had changed. Like […]