Hitting the Wall

I often equate going through a divorce to being in a severe car accident. In both cases you emerge very badly battered and wounded, one emotionally and the other physically. Just as it takes a significant amount of time to heal from the physical injuries of a car accident, it also takes significant time to heal emotionally from […]

Overcoming Fear

One of the most common reactions to divorce is fear. That is very understandable. Who wouldn’t be scared if their entire life came crashing in around them? The problem with fear is not being scared, that’s normal. The problem is acting on fear. That’s when fear becomes a lousy strategy. Here is a better strategy: […]

Pain Instructs

Not long ago one of my teenagers was grumbling about not being able to go out with friends because she had mismanaged her money and did not have enough money to buy gas for her car. She was not happy. We had a brief parent/daughter exchange about what lesson she learned from not managing her […]

Made for Greatness

It is very easy to become disillusioned with our faith and with God when dealing with the crushing difficulty of divorce. It can be a lonely time, and God can feel very distant. We can become resigned to thinking that our lot in life is to endure some form of misery for the remainder of our […]

Just Not My Time

 “Of course I want intimacy. Every man and every woman does…I look in the mirror each morning and I tell myself, it’s just not my time. God’s got someone out there for me, it’s just not my time.” says Kerri, a 40-ish, divorced, single parent appearing in the Voices of Hope DVD. When sharing her attitude toward dating […]

Lite Brite

I had a Lite Brite as a kid and loved it. It always excited me to start out with a blank, black page and see the picture that would emerge as I carefully pushed each colored peg through the paper. I would turn off all the lights in my room and marvel at the image […]

Believe

“I can’t ever imagine my life without this overwhelming pain,” I managed to choke out between my sobs to my counselor. It had been about three months after my divorce was filed, and I was overwhelmed with grief. I believed the rest of my life was going to be filled with the intense emotional pain […]

Angels

“If God really loves me, where is he now when I need him the most?” That was the thought that ran through my mind often during those first weeks and months when my divorce hit. Sure, I read over and over in the Gospels how God will never abandon me. How even the hairs on […]