“I can’t ever imagine my life without this overwhelming pain,” I managed to choke out between my sobs to my counselor. It had been about three months after my divorce was filed, and I was overwhelmed with grief. I believed the rest of my life was going to be filled with the intense emotional pain […]
One day, when I was around fourteen, my mom picked me up from my bus stop after school. As I climbed in the car, I saw a brand-new guitar sitting in the back seat. I asked her who it was for, and she said, “You!” I was shocked. How did she know that I really […]
One day, as I walked into the kitchen, my four-year-old son was watching his favorite TV show. Patting the seat of his chair, he looked up at me with these big, puppy-dog eyes and said, “Can you come and sit with me?” My heart melted. Even though I had a million things to do, I could […]
The best way I can describe the suffering from my divorce is it was like a heavy weight strapped to my back, combined with a gnawing ache in the pit of my stomach. It was always there. The only relief I would get was when I slept. Unfortunately, the second my eyes opened, the pain […]
During a recent all-day workshop, I had repeated often my view that if one had to go through a divorce, it was a blessing to be Catholic. My point was that our Catholic faith offers so much hope and healing, particularly through the Sacraments, that to have to go through a divorce without them makes the […]
“Mom, it feels like someone has died,” I tearfully said to my mother the month after my divorce was filed. The emotional pain was so overwhelming it paralyzed me. I couldn’t think clearly, and getting through the day doing even just basic tasks, like brushing my teeth or getting dressed, took every ounce of energy […]
The low point in my divorce came on Christmas morning, about two months after my divorce was filed. I actually got a call from my attorney; he wanted to discuss some aspect of my divorce (he didn’t celebrate Christmas since he was Jewish). I remember getting off that call and thinking, “I will be so […]
I often use the metaphor of a car crash to describe a divorce. Like a car crash, the people going through a divorce emerge very battered and bruised with the scars to show for it. Most people view scars as something bad, something to hide. But that is not how Jesus viewed His scars. His […]
Everyday is an opportunity: an opportunity to try again, an opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life, an opportunity to make an improvement in your life. Seize those opportunities every chance you can. It is so easy to live in the pain of yesterday, or be overwhelmed by the uncertainty of the future, that you can […]
Going through divorce often feels like a battle. Each day can be a fight just to keep your head above water, often doing the work of two people. All the while dealing with the extremely difficult emotional issues that a divorce invariably brings. It can be overwhelming and so discouraging. Recognize that the source of these […]