Scars

I often use the metaphor of a car crash to describe a divorce. Like a car crash, the people going through a divorce emerge very battered and bruised with the scars to show for it. Most people view scars as something bad, something to hide. But that is not how Jesus viewed His scars. His […]

Multicolored World

Going through my divorce was so painful. The life that I had built, the dreams I had, were now crumbling around my feet. The pain was overwhelming. I developed different ways to cope with this pain. Some of them were good, and some not. To find peace, I dove back into my long abandoned hobbies. That […]

Humble Pie

The month after my divorce was filed, my life was in crisis, to say the least. I was simultaneously dealing with the extremely painful emotional fallout, while trying to work, and take care of three small children. I was consumed with doing all the things I needed to get done. My attitude was, “It is all up […]

Do You Want the Truth?

“You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!”  Those were the famous words that Jack Nicholson delivered so passionately in the movie A Few Good Men.  And he was right.  Many people can’t handle the truth, especially when it sheds light on poor choices or brings on consequences.  This is often the case when […]

One-Two Punch

Are you having a hard time forgiving yourself? Take it to confession and know that Our Lord gave everything to forgive your sins, no matter how great. His mercy is always greater than your sin. Accept it. Next, ask yourself what you can do to repair the damage left by your sin, and do it. […]

Cursed

During a recent all-day workshop, I had repeated often my view that if one had to go through a divorce, it was a blessing to be Catholic. My point was that our Catholic faith offers so much hope and healing, particularly through the Sacraments, that to have to go through a divorce without them makes the […]

Oprah

Going through my divorce turned my world upside-down. I suddenly started to question everything in my life. What was true? Who could be trusted? It was like my life was thrust into darkness and I was stumbling around trying to gain my bearings. I would talk to anyone who I thought could help me: friends, family, […]

Persevere

Going through divorce often feels like a battle. Each day can be a fight just to keep your head above water, often doing the work of two people. All the while dealing with the extremely difficult emotional issues that a divorce invariably brings. It can be overwhelming and so discouraging. Recognize that the source of these […]

Counterweight

Each step I took up the stairs was a struggle. It felt like my feet were encased in concrete. It was the night before the court hearing that would determine the outcome of my divorce and the custody of my children. I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. I didn’t want to […]

Fear Factor

Divorce can bring a tremendous amount of fear, uncertainty and doubt. In a moment, a lifetime of dreams and plans can be destroyed. It is during these times that it can feel like you were dropped in a foreign land-with no map-in the dark. It can be a very scary feeling! Scripture repeatedly reassures us […]