Dealing With Your Former Spouse

“I have had situations where clients have said to me: ‘I have prayed my rosary everyday for three years and that has not changed my ex one bit.’ Well, the wrong person got changed.”, shares Sandy McKay, a wonderful, Catholic therapist on the Voices of Hope DVD. This is so true. I know I fell into this trap of […]

When Not To Compromise

In an effort to appease my not-so-religious spouse, I had to temper my enthusiasm for my Catholic Faith. One compromise I made was to delegate Mary to the back yard during the years of my marriage. She had been placed in a beautiful garden, but I always felt sorry that I had felt compelled to […]

Perfect Prayer

When my divorce hit, it was as if I was run over by a freight train. I hardly knew what hit me. I was confused, disoriented, and could barely think long enough to decide what color socks to wear. It was that bad. My instinctual reaction was to turn to God. That was good. However, […]

What The Heck?

“What the heck are you doing to me?!” was my plea to God when my world was crashing down around me those first days after my divorce hit. I was angry, especially at God. I thought that He always had my back, and now I felt abandoned. I blamed God for not saving my marriage. […]

Eject Button

What do getting divorced, remarried, and divorced again in less than nine months, leaving your kids to become a groupie for a rock band, and moving to South America all have in common? They are all real choices made by people during their first year of divorce. Why would people make such obviously poor decisions? […]

War

The pain was very evident in her voice and on her face as Ellen described how, because of their emotional distress, her two youngest boys were actually pulling out their eyebrows. Ellen had gone through a bitter divorce three years earlier. She and her ex were still waging war daily for some reason or another. Most […]

Lucky

By reading through the Gospels, the evidence is clear: Christ was focused on healing. It was one of the main acts of compassion that He performed as He traveled around spreading His message of love and the kingdom of God. As word spread of His healing miracles, people came from all over Israel to find Him […]

Bedrock

During a recent all-day workshop, I had repeated often my view that if one had to go through a divorce, it was a blessing to be Catholic. My point was that our Catholic faith offers so much hope and healing, particularly through the Sacraments, that to have to go through a divorce without them makes the […]

Good Grief

“Mom, it feels like someone has died,” I tearfully said to my mother the month after my divorce was filed. The emotional pain was so overwhelming it paralyzed me. I couldn’t think clearly, and getting through the day doing even just basic tasks, like brushing my teeth or getting dressed, took every ounce of energy […]