“I have had situations where clients have said to me: ‘I have prayed my rosary everyday for three years and that has not changed my ex one bit.’ Well, the wrong person got changed.”, shares Sandy McKay, a wonderful, Catholic therapist on the Voices of Hope DVD. This is so true. I know I fell into this trap of […]
Not long after my divorce was final, my former spouse and I had a rather cutting verbal exchange. It had something to do with the kids or money, I can’t quite remember. What I do remember is sitting in my car afterward with my head dropped down on my chest feeling very defeated. The two […]
“I can’t forgive him, he’s not sorry for what he did.” was the response from Stacy when she was asked how she felt about forgiving her former spouse. She went on to explain that she thought that, just as in order to receive forgiveness from God for our sins we must be truly sorry, the […]
Several years ago, I brought my then five-year-old daughter to the doctor for her annual physical. She was due for a couple of immunizations, and I was trying to find a delicate way of answering her repeated question, “Am I going to get any shots?” I managed to avoid answering the question directly with responses […]
Did you ever find it odd that so many of the Gospel stories have Jesus interacting with the outcasts of society? It seems that for most of his public life, Jesus went out of his way to interact with the lepers, tax collectors, prostitutes and social misfits of his day. These outcasts were his people […]
With the recent anniversary of Pope St. John Paul II’s canonization on Divine Mercy Sunday 2014, it is a good time to be reminded of what this amazing pope and saint-to-be said about divorced Catholics. He has our back! I earnestly call upon pastors and the whole community of the faithful to help the […]
“This generation is always looking for a quick fix.” spilled out of my mouth as I was sharing some parenting challenge with a friend. I was smug in my surety that I was different–that I was older and wiser. But the truth is, I’m really not. In fact, I think most people, no matter their […]
I often think about the Catholics that have left the faith because of their divorce. The reasons they left are usually because they feel alienated, ashamed, or unwelcome. Often, the annulment process is a stumbling block, too. In any case, there is usually a sense of loss when I talk to them. It is sad. I […]
As a kid, I used to go fishing and swimming at a lake near our house during the summer. At night, the lights on the docks would flicker on automatically when it became dark. As if on cue, a swarm of bugs would appear and hover around the dock, attracted by the light. Love is […]
The month after my divorce was filed, my life was in crisis, to say the least. I was simultaneously dealing with the extremely painful emotional fallout, while trying to work, and take care of three small children. I was consumed with doing all the things I needed to get done. My attitude was, “It is all up […]