No Pain. No Gain.

“I can’t believe I did that! Is this me?!,” exclaimed one of our workshop participants (we’ll call her Jayne) after sharing that she recently defended her ex-husband to her family. Evidently, Jayne’s family was giving her a rather hard time about her ex, and she responded by defending him in his absence. What surprised her […]

Elbow Room

One time, my ex and I were butting heads over some custody issues. We had reached an impasse and neither of us was willing to budge. In my mind, issues regarding the well-being of the kids were non-negotiable. I tried everything I could think of to break the logjam. Nothing worked. After several weeks of […]

Change Agent

“I have had situations where clients have said to me: ‘I have prayed my rosary everyday for three years and that has not changed my ex one bit.’  Well, the wrong person got changed.”,  shares Sandy McKay, a wonderful, Catholic therapist on the Voices of Hope DVD. This is so true.  I know I fell into […]

Below the Surface

It was about a month into my divorce when my former spouse stopped by the house to pick up something. She was all decked-out and clearly very excited about that night’s “big date.” I will never forget it. Here I was being crushed under the emotional weight of the divorce, yet she seemed so unscathed […]

Love Leader

One night, I was in a boat with my brother on a lake near where I live. We could see lightning in the distance and thought that it was far away. It was getting late and we decided to head back to the dock. We were about 15 minutes into a 30 minute boat ride, […]

Tranquility

“I hope she rots in Hell!” I screamed at God at the top of my lungs as I drove to work. I had just gotten done listening to my former spouse’s rationale on how our divorce would actually be “good for the kids.” I was so angry and hurt over the pain and distress I […]

Freedom

“I can’t forgive him, he’s not sorry for what he did.” was the response from Stacy when she was asked how she felt about forgiving her former spouse. She went on to explain that she thought that, just as in order to receive forgiveness from God for our sins we must be truly sorry, the […]

Called To Lead

One night, I was in a boat with my brother on a lake near where I live. We could see lightning in the distance and thought that it was far away. It was getting late and we decided to head back to the dock. We were about 15 minutes into a 30 minute boat ride, when suddenly, […]