Dealing With Your Former Spouse

“I have had situations where clients have said to me: ‘I have prayed my rosary everyday for three years and that has not changed my ex one bit.’ Well, the wrong person got changed.”, shares Sandy McKay, a wonderful, Catholic therapist on the Voices of Hope DVD. This is so true. I know I fell into this trap of […]

Overcoming Challenges

I thought that once my divorce was final, life would get back to some sense of normal and most of my divorce-related struggles would disappear. Yeah, right. I quickly discovered that the primary change was the types of struggles I faced, not struggles themselves.   My main struggle initially was committing to a chaste lifestyle. That one […]

Below the Surface

It was about a month into my divorce when my former spouse stopped by the house to pick up something. She was all decked-out and clearly very excited about that night’s “big date.” I will never forget it. Here I was being crushed under the emotional weight of the divorce, yet she seemed so unscathed […]

Love Leader

One night, I was in a boat with my brother on a lake near where I live. We could see lightning in the distance and thought that it was far away. It was getting late and we decided to head back to the dock. We were about 15 minutes into a 30 minute boat ride, […]

No Pain. No Gain.

“I can’t believe I did that! Is this me?!,” exclaimed one of our workshop participants (we’ll call her Jayne) after sharing that she recently defended her ex-husband to her family. Evidently, Jayne’s family was giving her a rather hard time about her ex, and she responded by defending him in his absence. What surprised her […]

Freedom

“I can’t forgive him, he’s not sorry for what he did.” was the response from Stacy when she was asked how she felt about forgiving her former spouse. She went on to explain that she thought that, just as in order to receive forgiveness from God for our sins we must be truly sorry, the […]

Anchored Down

About a year after my divorce was final, I was invited to go on a spiritual retreat. During the retreat I heard a talk about the need to forgive those who have hurt you. Well, I could definitely relate to the being hurt part, but, frankly, the thought of forgiving my ex just made me angry. I […]